“A constructive, useful life, good works, and good relationships are as valid as writing poetry or inventing a machine. Anything that one does well and obtains satisfaction from is a good enough reason for living. To be a decent human being that people like and feel better for knowing is enough.”
This might seem so abstract in length but simple in its message if read correctly. It’s open for your interpretation and application.
I do feel that their is an individual rhythm and harmony that allows us to function at our best whether it is on a personal stage or one shared in front of others.
Again you weren’t put here on this world to cure cancer or solve world hunger (nice if you could) nor were you to solve the problems of everyone around you (that belongs individually to the bearer of those problems). That’s too large a weight to carry and there is so many simple and dramatic things you can do that added up just might alter the small portion of the world you own.
The minimum that is expected? Be kind to yourself and to others – not just the main characters of your performance but the extras not identified in the credits. We’ve led ourselves to believe that conversations and meaningful discussions occur with the entry of letters on our phone or computer and hitting the “send” button. That’s fine when there is little alternative but remember the greater the issues of the topic, the greater the need for direct physical and emotional interaction because more meaning is transferred through such exchanges. Jason, remember when our neighbor would need to talk to you when her family was having problems – I’m guessing more meaningful to cry on your shoulder than cry through a text.
I was talking to J and he shared that he can’t engage people like I do these days (who can since I’m nuts) and I get it. When you’re young, there is that hesitancy due to fear of rejection or uncertainty about the response in return. Your still trying to juggle between acceptance, appreciation, and the perception of others’ expectations. DONT THINK SO MUCH!
Be at peace with yourself first and then maybe you’ll be more comfortable sharing that peace. You all know those days when you “feel good about yourself” and that is the harmony you should strive for because it’s not a consistent rhythm. If it’s not there for whatever reason, challenge yourself to give meaning to the small gestures that we use robotically each day to see if it takes you closer to that harmony. I’ve talked to Christian about certain automatic responses we engage in and altering them to see what difference they might make.
When asked “how are you”, maybe respond with something like “good and I really hope you are too!” If you sneeze and someone says “God bless you”, how about “I am blessed (because you have been) and hope you are blessed as well!” After getting a surprised initial look, you’ll find it invites additional questions or information and maybe (heaven forbid) an actual conversation where that exchange is given new life and newly created rhythm and harmony. As a lawyer, I found that the best questions were never asked because I didn’t listen to a person’s response to an earlier question or didn’t react accordingly because I wouldn’t stray from the script entrenched in my head. I became a better lawyer by not only listening to people but being aware of their facial expressions and body language and it serves me well now in my growth as a better person. My harmony is based on not only how I view myself but how I have relearned to view other people by taking the risk of improving not only on my expected encounters but those that occur out of pure chance. This all a part of my belief offers us a daily “simple, basic elegance” that is magical in its simplicity and a launching point for improvement of each day.
Just read this quote and I’ll end with it because it invites self-evaluation. “How lovely to think that no one need wait a moment. We can start now, start slowly, changing the world. How lovely that everyone, great and small, can make a contribution toward introducing justice straightaway. And you can always, always give something, even if it is only kindness!”