Monthly Archives: April 2016

When Cliches Have Meaning – Thoughts For My Children To Think About

29 Friday Apr 2016

Posted by in Confessional, Finding Happiness, Kindness, Looking forward, Reflection

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Hermann Park, Houston

(Originally Posted March, 2015 – With Addendum)

10/7/14

I’m not a big fan of cliches.  They are used too frequently without thought and just products of repetitive statements we use during complex situations that certainly require something of more value and sentiment to the recipient.

I was thinking of one in particular.  “I’m here for you” or “I’m there for you”.  I get the basic gist of it – a simple offering of support and maybe a little more but what should it mean?  I guess I could devote a great deal of analysis to these statements but my evaluation is centered around what I’ve meant when saying it in the past compared to now, and what it’s meant when offered in my direction.

Thinking when I used to say it, I pretty much meant it literally. I’d be “here” for someone but they’d have to generally come to where I was if they needed something important.  I was “there” for someone but not really.  I was usually at a safe distance so that I would be unable or unwilling to get “there”.  Not always and maybe not intentionally but in thinking back, too frequently.

In addition, I find little comfort when someone says “I’m there for you” when going through tough times.  I really don’t need a congregation of people at where I’m at since I already know how I got “there” and don’t like where “there” is at.  I may not expect the answers but it won’t help me to have company “there”.  What is needed is a temporary escape from “there” and maybe another mind and set of eyes to show me a possible way to get out of “there” because a cascade of thoughts and emotions sometimes complicates the recognition of the simplest and most logical solutions.

I know, this sounds like a bad comedy bit but here’s the point.  Now when I say “I’m here for you”, it means that when called upon, I will be “there with you.”  I understand that trying to provide a quick solution to a complex dilemma generally leads down a more complex path or at times proving to be more destructive.  I do know that taking someone from where they may be (figuratively and/or literally), slowing things down, maybe mixing a genuine hug and reason to smile, and letting them be heard so that they can hear themselves on the outside of their mind provides a good starting point to get out of “there”.  This then challenges the best parts of myself by seeing what that person (not me) is capable of doing and offering small guidance about what might be done to slowly take their initial steps somewhere else.  Importantly they will know that if needed, I will support and help them up (not carry) when they stumble and fall.  More importantly I will reinforce them on the best direction because it’s their obligation to “make it happen” for themselves.

This is a lot of words but a simple point I hope you recognize.  By who you are, you have the best potential to be difference makers.  By virtue of how you were raised and the nature of your character, personality, compassion, morality, and fundamental beliefs, you can provide so much of the best part of who you are to others.  I’m not just talking about the obvious targets like girlfriends or family but also friends and acquaintances who are reluctant to demonstrate the hidden cracks on their hearts and souls.

How often do we ask “what’s wrong” and get a response like “I’m fine” or “okay” (save that discussion for another day) and settle for it when we know things are absolutely the opposite. I won’t ask “what you are waiting for” but more “why are you waiting”?  You are no longer the “innocents” of my generation but increasingly responsible and accountable for your generation.  If you want a perfect world, time to start perfecting the world around you and see if it can be expanded a bit at a time through your own acts of kindness based on your own goodness.

I’ll end with the words of a U2 song.  “A broken (or injured) heart is an open heart” so if you recognize it, maybe that’s the time you could really be “there” to help it heal – this is separate and apart from romantic relationships but on a more profound scale.  Simple gestures might just lead to small miracles. Either way, I’ve been “here for you”, will be “there with you”, and help you get away from “there”, and always will!  It’s not hard to find me, you know?

So think about what you say to someone and the actual real meaning behind it and then, give more meaning afterwards to what you just said because one day you may be the one person they need to rely on!  It may be a heavier burden than anticipated but sometimes, affirmations that evidence your character may also call upon untempered accountability so that the perfect world you’re looking for might reveal itself beyond your horizons.

Dad

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Giving Back To All Us Parents – Message To My Sons

24 Sunday Apr 2016

Posted by in Baseball Equals Life, Gratitude, Kindness, Looking forward, Reflection

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12/8/14

“So with imagination, ingenuity and audacity, explore, discover, change the world.  And have fun while you’re at it.  Always take time out to love and to live.  You’re going to be busy, but never forget family and friends.”

Now this is about remembering family and friends as you rapidly grow in age and growingly become immersed in external interests.  To make it simple, I’m going to equate it to your baseball games and their influence on all of our family units.  Even if you sometimes forget or ignore it, I doubt that you ever feel like you don’t have the support of your family.  I mean no matter how you add it up, each equation involves the contribution, input, guidance, and sacrifice of your family and I’m not talking from a time or financial perspective.  We have to sacrifice our own personal emotional and mental balance each time you rise up to a challenge at the plate, on the field, on the mound, in every aspect of your preparation, and in the aftermath of the ultimate results.  And after that, the circle repeats itself as it has done in almost every aspect of your life.  No verbal thanks necessary since we willingly volunteered for this duty with some challenges easy and other unexpectedly harder than others.

As far as baseball, I enjoy that it keeps our families connected because the fields and their stands are the common ground that we share through your continued maturity and development.  With that growth, I hope you maintain an ever evolving recognition of who and what has taken you to where you are and jump started you to all the great things in the future.  In addition, those same entities will keep you balanced through the unavoidable tough times.

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I saw that the 76ers finally won their first game this season. The team’s ownership shamelessly has decided to tank the whole season and play overmatched players so that they have a higher spot in next year’s lottery selection.  It sickens me that a sports franchise would sink to new lows ignoring not only it’s proud history but also senselessly humiliate those players and their coaches.

More upsetting is the outright neglect of it’s long time fans who either are forced to bear witness to this abomination or completely disregard a well established loyalty that took years to nurture and grow.  More upsetting are thoughts of the elderly or seriously ill fans who were around the last time the team won a championship and now with management’s present strategy, know they have little chance of seeing it again in their lifetime.  Owners and players come and go but what about those who’s identity of their community, for better or worse, is connected to their teams.  That’s why I feel increasingly disappointed each year the Angels don’t make it to another World Series or even more disheartening, rumors of them leaving Anaheim.

Now back to baseball.  There’s a common saying that you should live like it’s your last day so by extension, you should play each game like it’s your last one.  I doubt with your youth and imagined immortality that such thinking really enters your mind other than as an overused mantra of little impact.

So now let me alter that particular recommendation so that it seems closer to home. Keep in mind my recent writing about the book “Flowers for Algernon” and the movie “Charly”, and how it philosophically relates to my injury, current circumstances, and future prognosis including the possibility of remission.  I mean it’s a fact that I was so lucky to live to be a part of some of the most important baseball events in your lives over the last year with higher expectations this upcoming year. Really take a minute (please at least 60 seconds) to think about how critical it was to my physical and mental well-being, knowing my love of baseball, to be in the stands and bear witness to your best performances as well as struggles on the field.  It’s impossible to calculate its value but where and who I am right now was greatly affected by your efforts whether you realize it or not.

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Now to “playing like it’s your last game”.  How about “playing like it’s my last game”, and please don’t equate it to the dire extreme of something like death because that’s way too dramatic for this conversation.  Jason remember that movie “Memento” I told you about and how the guy could only remember events that occurred for a short time so he’d tattoo things on his body so that he would know what happened.  You know early on after the injury, there are still some things that occurred at your games that are blurry or probably lost.  A few regrets about that but so many good memories took their place.

So bottom line, “play like it’s my last game” or even beyond that, “play like it’s the rest of your families’ last game” because we’ve invested a lot to get to that point. I don’t care how hard you “tried” or if you “tried your best”.  I only care that you “played your best” with passion and without any doubt in my mind that you did because in the remote chance it’s the last game I can recall from my brain, I want all of us to look back on it with satisfaction and the biggest smiles when we talk about it!  No pressure but I wouldn’t ask anything that you guys aren’t capable of doing on a consistent basis so let’s GET IT DONE for me, your family, and anyone whose watching because it’s a gift that should be shared!

Why “Joe Dico” Writes (And Shares) – Thoughts To Family

19 Tuesday Apr 2016

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Dico’s in Fenway For 52nd Birthday

(Original Posted 12/15 – Worth Remembering And Sharing)

4/2/15

“When you make people angry, they act in accordance with their baser instincts, often violently and irrationally.  When you inspire people, they act in accordance with their higher instincts, sensibly and rationally.  Also, anger is transient, whereas inspiration has a life-long effect.” – Peace Pilgrim

I met the mother of my friend Jessie at the gym and frankly it was a privilege. I thanked her for the son she raised and not because of the impressive young man I’ve known since I met him – that was the easy part since first impressions only last so long without something to fortify those impressions, you know?  But here’s what made meeting her such a privilege:  knowing some of the difficulties he had to overcome (with some of his own creation which he acknowledges) and knowing that without her influence, guidance, assistance, and support, he would have not gotten past them to become the man he is today.  In talking with Jessie about those obstacles I’ve formed the impression that he has the mindset that every stutter or knee-buckling step in the past hasn’t stopped him from walking or sprinting towards the future with a much better direction in mind.  In speaking with her, she was kind enough to mention that I served as some sort of inspiration to him but I told her that it had more to do with him than me for the following reasons and perception.

I’ve noticed one thing that separates so many when it comes to levels of inspiration.  A majority (I’m guessing) likes the feeling of being inspired by meaningful words and stories that temporarily makes them feel in such a way but that’s where the lessons end.  Maybe to them, such stories are entertaining and moving for the moment but generally replaced by the next source of entertainment with little thought thereafter about the possible lasting influence they could have had as they reseed back into the waters that too often leave them adrift.  It’s understandable given the abundance of information that passes quickly by each hour it seems.

The rest of the population are not only open to being inspired but they also believe that they can be inspired, take whatever useful information they can take from that inspiration, and actually use it to drive them from where they don’t want to be, and towards where they want and strive to be with the a renewed faith that they are capable of getting there!  I mean if something can truly “move” us emotionally and spiritually so much that it filters into to the core of our structure, why not use it to “move” in the best direction for ourselves?

I often think of the more tragic plots and sub-plots behind the stories that drive us to tears and it reminded me of something I wrote 25-30 years ago.  It essentially stated that the suffering of “mankind” can bring out the best in “humanity” if it can give us motivation towards the purpose of further appreciation for what we have, and to assist those who have significantly less!  This is where we need people like Deb who live their dreams by fulfilling the dreams of others.

I need no greater example of inspiration than “Lauren Hill” (not the singer) who was featured on ESPN and I hope you guys remember her story and if not, I’ll show you the clip about her again or you can look her up on Google to remind you.  That young 19 year-old was diagnosed with terminal cancer, lived her dream to play AND score in her only college basketball game, and stayed on this earth long after living past her doctors’ prediction that she would not see 2015.  And in doing so, she raised well over $2M for cancer research after her story became public and continued to raise more after her tragic death in April, 2015.

Since that time, she has served as my hero and inspiration so that I never wallow in my own perceived hardships which seem so trivial by comparison, and to drive myself to be as kind as possible to me and others regardless of how I’m treated or what I receive in return.  I mean how can I allow myself to “suffer” over the insignificant when I’ve been a witness to “true suffering and pain” through stories like Lauren and the misfortune of experiencing the same on a more deeply personal level?  That would make me feel like a coward and a poor reflection on the legacy my parents left behind before they left me!

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(Lauren Hill)

I mentioned in something I wrote to Deb and Jason last week about the fact that I don’t really fear death for reasons too complex to detail here but I it’s ironic that I was totally unprepared when Ms. Hill’s depared this planet, especially after reading her mother’s most recent post about Lauren’s condition.  Although I never met this “random angel”, she has had a greater impact on me over the last six months than most people that immediately come to mind.  J and C, keep repeating “Lauren Hill, Lauren Hill…” to yourselves during those times you think things are so rough, or struggling with obvious decisions for yourself because more distracting choices present themselves.  While you’re wasting that time, I’m sure Lauren and many others like her would love that time and the opportunities that are being wasted!

So here’s the point and I apologize for the lengthy soliloquy but these ramblings needed some context for these concluding thoughts.  I told Jessie afterwards that it was sweet that his Mom found me somewhat inspirational from what I’ve shared with him.  Still, I don’t necessarily right to “inspire” but I am very gratified if that’s the end result.

I first started writing to motivate and inspire myself through some fairly daunting challenges.  I also wrote to help guide and assist Deb and the boys through both calm and stormy waters as any good husband and father should, especially since I almost didn’t get a chance to do so given the circumstances that almost took my life.  Thereafter it spread to a select group of friends, like my “adopted” son Cole, his mom Dee Dee, and other family members who seemed to take something from what I shared with them.  From there, I continued to write for those same people and a growing number of others who could possibly use it, and because it continued to give me peace, a cathartic release, and just to remind me of so much I can’t afford to ignore again.

What I write I share with a great deal of humility and not an ounce of vanity or ego, and most certainly not in a misguided attempt for attention.  Usually intentional attempts for the latter soon become transparent with a lasting impression that is usually contrary to the original intent.  Trust me, my desire and need for attention is minimal but I keep an eye out for those who could use or rightfully deserve it.

The bottom line is that through a lot of trial and error with varying levels of success, middle-grounds, and products of questionable choices, I’ve acquired a lot of information over 52 years since I’ve had a considerable amount of time to reflect upon it.  In the end, I needed to get whatever messages to my family in case my next battle with mortality may not end up as favorable and who else is going to care enough and have the time do it other than Deb?  I’m so thankful that anyone beyond my close circle finds meaning in anything I’ve shared and that those who fall into the latter category described above (or even those somewhere on the fence) can use it.  But all I hope is that if you get nothing from what I share, please find it somewhere because there’s an abundance of individuals out there that give us the opportunity.  As for me, I often find it at times in some of those who may be reading this right now (i.e., Deb, Jason, Christian, Dee Dee, Cole, my Uncle Sam and Aunt Irma, my cousin Marcy, Jessie, Marlena, etc.) even though they may not know it and all I can simply say is…Thank You!

I’ll end with this. “The heart that gives, gathers.” – Marianne Moore. It’s a big reason why I still write but more importantly why I continue to SHARE!

A Living Choice

16 Saturday Apr 2016

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(Feeling Alive Overlooking Redondo Marina – Originally Posted 1/15)

“There may be times where some would expect us to sour on life.  We should remember the best reason against it.  We are alive!  If nothing else immediately comes to mind, we should think about good memories, have a great deal of hope for the ones ahead of us, and eventually make an effort to find a reason that’s probably right in front of us.” – Joe Dicochea

 

Taking Action Towards Your Dreams – Thoughts To My Sons

14 Thursday Apr 2016

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(Redondo High School Senior Sea Hawks D1 Baseball Commits:  Conor Riley – Long Beach State; Marco Valenzuela – University of Nevada; Jason Dicochea – University of Santa Clara; Sean Reynolds – Rice University.  Photo by Marcos mom Amanda)

Originally Posted January, 2015 and modified for this post

“You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them.” ~ Michael Jordan

Now think about you want.  Now think about how you’re fully capable of getting it.  Now think about what you are willing to do better than others to get it first.  You can’t have anything unless you do a lot more than JUST THINK about it.  Oh and while you’re still trying to decide, someone’s probably already doing it and maybe even better, leaving you to race from behind for something that should have belonged to you in the first place.  I don’t know about you but that thought alone would piss me off!  Then again, that’s just me and what do I know (brain injury and all)?

So in thinking about the thoughts outlined above, I’ll end asking you to remember what I’ve told you many times before:  Great things that happen, along with anything resembling greatness for yourselves, is not achieved by accident.  You have to work hard not only with the gifts God has provided, the ones you discover that you initially didn’t understand, and to overcompensate for the ones He didn’t provide.  I guess you’ve just been fortunate to have me as your Dad to constantly point it out and remind you which I’m sure you’ll do one day for your children!

What Counts In Baseball – Thoughts To My Boys

10 Sunday Apr 2016

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(Christian Heading Home Making It Count)

8/2/14 – Originally Posted A Year Ago)

“Not everything that’s counted counts and not everything that counts can be counted.”

Who knew that Albert Einstein knew so much about baseball!

You have to remember that there have been MLB mvp’s that were not prototypical power or high average hitters.  There have been exceptional role players who were so excellent in doing their roles that they were the catalyst behind the overall performance of their team, even if the numbers by themselves were unremarkable, ie, defense, base running, situational hitting, leadership.

With that being said, remember this: On defense make all the routine plays, make the exceptional plays look routine, and have the incredible plays soon taken for granted because you make them so frequently.  Hit or throw through your cut off, don’t make needless throws that can cost a run or put a man in scoring position, think about “plan B” in a double play you can’t turn with men on first and second and see if the guy rounding third might deserve a quick throw.  In fact always think about reasonable options because if the ball is in your hand, you determine when the play is over.

Strive to make each at-bat productive and not something exciting to the average baseball fan.  True baseball fans, scouts, and coaches, know the difference and the importance of an executed bunt, hit-and-run, sacrifice fly, and perfectly placed ground balls to move runners into scoring position or scoring them from third.

So with all that being said and given the fact that there’s a lot that has to be processed during each play of every game, especially where you have significant and even marginal opportunities to make things “count”, I’ll leave you with this quote.  “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.” – Napoleon Hill.  Added up, they turn out to be “greatest” results as it relates to not only baseball, but all the “great” things you want for yourselves and others in your lives!

Life Is So Precious Because… – Message To Family

07 Thursday Apr 2016

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(With Christian Years Back)

4/6/16

“Life gets so much more precious, when there’s less of it to waste”. – Bonnie Raitt

It just occurred to me that one year ago at this time, I was in the ER after two unexpected grand mal seizures that occurred while driving that happened literally seconds after I pulled over with Christian in the car knowing something wasn’t right.  Luckily Christian, all of 13 years-old, stayed calm and got me the help I needed during the time I was traveling amidst the haze of these developments, finding myself on the curb with paramedics treating me and Deb at my side.

So in thinking back as I shared with Christian today, had he not been in the car with me when I was seeing the auras that at the time I didn’t understand we’re precursors to the seizures I was soon to experience, I might not have pulled over seconds before they occurred.  So in a sense Christian saved my life that day by his presence, just like all of you have each done so many times before when it sometimes been so f’ing hard to do so on my own on more occasions than I’ve ever let you or anyone else know because that’s never been my way in this life of mine, or I just can’t remember all the countless times over the years those moments have almost struck me down, you know?  I’m supposed to be strong enough or so it has seemed throughout most of my life as a result of the way my parents raised and continuously demonstrated to me, and I guess I’m still here on this earth because of it.

So what’s it mean?  Well if Christian hadn’t been there giving me the awareness that I had to protect him and pull over, I would not have been there to see Jason’s game that night in Irvine (after a great deal of persuasion and begging to get the doctors to discharge me from the hospital), the one last night, and all the ones in between; or seen Christian’s game last Saturday or everyone in between; or even be here as Mom reaches the 46th year of her life after knowing her for all of them other than the sixteen years before those.

I know things are not as centered as I’d/we’d always wish but I wonder had it been my time to join my parents at this time last year, or when my appendix ruptured in October and went untreated for a week, or my first falls in 2013 that led to a traumatic brain injury and first seizures that I somehow recovered from when there was some doubt that I would, or the recent second fall where I would have bled out had I not been found unconscious, or just those times I tripped over myself and couldn’t get out of my head, what would have been missed or lost by us had it been my time to leave this earthly existence, or stop fighting and just give up, which is seemingly the same thing in my mind.  It’s impossible to know or imagine but I’m here with hope, optimism, and love as always as each day continues to present itself, even on certain days when life challenges my faith in its meaning.  All I can do is thank you and be grateful for being there and giving me sustaining breaths when the air was almost taken away from me way too many times since you’ve been part of my life, and in a sense all of us!

Upon quiet reflection and in looking back which is hard because it gives rise to some temporal pain with the honesty, it seems the last few (maybe several) years are an illustration of persistence through the good and epic chapters we’ve written but especially the tougher ones but boy, it’s hard to argue with what’s occurred, been overcome, and ultimately been achieved to date that I’ve been blessed to be a part of with so much more I could ever dream of or imagine.  With that said, I’ll end with this quote:  “There is no such thing as a quantum leap.  There is only dogged persistence – and in the end you make it look like a quantum leap.” – James Dyson

I love you all!  Thank you for letting me share because I’m sometimes not strong enough to hold it in – more temporal honesty there.

“Graceful” Or Not, Just Try – Message To Family

05 Tuesday Apr 2016

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(Owen and Jason – Photo By Debbie Dicochea.  Shout Out To Special Olympics)

4/5/16

“I’ve learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.” – Martha Washington

Just because you can’t do something “gracefully” shouldn’t stop us from doing it in any way, shape, or form, because we will tragically never know not only how much me lose, but sadly how much more we can gain even with the simplest of efforts.  We should remind ourselves that at important times we need to release the perfectionist in so many of us, and those aspects of our mindset should never be a reason to not try to accomplish what can be done, even if it’s less than perfect because it’s still produces a result much greater than had we done nothing at all!

Let me give you something to think about and maybe it’s only because of the way I process things now at my age and with a sordid amount of experience.  Consider a sprinter competing in a race and as he’s about to cross the finish line in first place, he stumbles and trips across that line while still retaining the winning margin.  Do you think it matters in the end as he stands at the top of the podium with the medal placed across his neck during the reward ceremony how it looked during the final moments of that race, grace or lack there of notwithstanding!

Then consider something from a different perspective that is close to Mom’s heart and soul:  Special Olympic athletes!  So why do I bring them up you may ask?  Well here’s the reason why and it should matter to all even though it unfortunately took some time to register in some manner to me, and I’m so appreciative to Deb and others including my boys that it does.

The evolution of my understanding came from Deb’s considerable work with and investment of her soul in SO and was accentuated by the journey of a little guy named Owen and his family, who own a special place in the hearts of this family.  I’m thinking that it is probably a much more simple process for the SO athletes to jump into such worthy challenges and competitions but I’m guessing there’s an element of trepidation in the minds of their parents, at least at the outset, to put on display how truly “special” their children are.  Maybe they may not have the simple “grace” or “flash” many envision of the prototypical Olympians on television but I think the initial trepidation of the parents of SO participants quickly dissipates once they see their children embark and embrace with unabashed fortitude, fervor, joy, and happiness as they compete and rejoice in the spirit of the words expressed in SO’s motto:  “Let me win.  But if I cannot win, let me be brave in the attempt.”  I love them and others like Owen for showing me that what may not originally be described as “graceful” depending on the aspects of the evaluator, they certainly demonstrate courage, bravery, beauty, and nobility by taking the first steps towards not just the first attempt but everyone afterwards and they are winners regardless of the official standings, at least in my eyes and so many around the world who follow and end up inspired by them.

And just to give you an understanding how overrated “grace” and “style” is, I’ll put in in terms for you boys to understand.  Do you remember when Josh Hamilton used to put on such a display of uselessness during his career by diving head first into first base on close plays.  The fans loved it, it made the highlights on ESPN and other sports outlets, and probably fueled his ego when he was an elite player.  Well I still recall the years he was an Angel when he repeatedly defended this method going into first, no matter how foolhardy the baseball experts and purists viewed it.  Well we can agree that Josh’s Angel career was a bust but nothing emulated that more than when he went head first again on a play and suffered a broken bone in his hand that put him on the disabled list and sidelined him from the lineup for weeks, and affected his entire season to the extent he was a highly paid non-factor for the Angels when he was paid to impact the team so much more!  It just seems that when others depend on you, you should not just make any effort but one that is committed to your best offerings and is ultimately smart, intelligent, and devoid of vanity and ego so that how those efforts “look” does not detract from what needs to be “accomplished”.

The bottom line for many of us who compete for something worthwhile should rest on the preparation so that we forge through whatever adversity that needs to be prevailed over.  And once we’ve done that, summon the courage to step up to the starting block to ultimately test our determination and launch ourselves at the sound of the starting gun into the uncertainty of not only the possibility of victory or even if that does not occur, maybe finishing faster or better than we’ve ever imagined for ourselves.  Beauty of perfectly performed acts should not be the ultimate measuring sticks since we are the scriptwriters of our stories and lives, and it shouldn’t always be calculated using “garden variety” measures in how we approach something requiring unconventional approaches.

Oftentimes entering the fray is our only leverage in the pursuit of a discovery of who we are, what we can accomplish, and what we ultimately achieve for ourselves and those that matter absent any style points restricting the initial decision to just f’ing “TRY”.  As I normally do, I’ll end with a quote and repeat one set forth above:  “Do one thing every day that scares you.” – Eleanor Roosevelt.  And once you take that step, remember SO’s motto “Let [us] win.  But if we cannot win, let us be brave in the attempt”, because with that effort, we ultimately win somewhere With each endeavor!  Good luck and thank you Deb and Owen to have graced me with that understanding.

Doing What’s Never Been Done – Revisiting 2015 Season

03 Sunday Apr 2016

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Now that the Redondo High School Baseball team has broken into the top 25 in the national rankings, I thought it would be an appropriate time to revisit where it started last year and as it carries into this one (Jason at top of celebration).
6/12/15

“If you hear a voice within you say, “you cannot paint”, then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.” – Vincent Van Gough

Boys think of this quote while in your youth so that you can carry it into adulthood.  In doing so, hopefully you will act upon it when you’re on the fence facing a choice that may positively influence your life and uncertainty gives you pause to venture ahead with the final decision.  Don’t allow limitations to be put in place by yourself without an attempt, or as a result of others telling you what can’t be done when there is no justifiable reason to at least try; and when you choose to explore the unknown, then “try your ass off” because if you’ve ventured beyond self-doubt, then nothing less should be acceptable!

So now here you are as high school baseball champions in a city that has never been privy to experiencing one before and you have to wonder after all this time about the percentage of people, alive and no longer on this earth, who truly believed when and if this could have been achieved with optimism dwindling each year it didn’t happen.  Look no farther than the picture of the players on that very first Redondo high team and spend a moment thinking of those boys who grew to men and having children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, etc., with all those generations starting each season with the hope that the next team(s) would bring home that title that proved so elusive for the 99 years afterwards, ending up no closer than a couple semifinal appearances (including the one last year).

It’s natural that when some things have never been done after a considerable amount of time, expectations consequently are redesigned by those of the growing number of casual spectators with measures of success being redefined after repeatedly falling short of the ultimate prize. But hears the part where those rules don’t apply regardless of the degree of devotion that fans of the team, including parents, possess.  It’s the players who carry the standards of faith and devotion to what they believe they can accomplish and in an odd way, what they feel is specifically reserved for themselves no matter how the odds, and sometimes mere chance, are stacked up against what actually occurs.

We as parents have supported you boys throughout this year but we will never have a precise understanding of the fellowship that was forged between you boys and the personal tests you had to pass that resulted in the run to this championship and you don’t know how good I am with that – that’s your property.  We had to honor our role as parents and temper our belief in our sons and the team with the possibility we might have to be there in a different capacity should you have fallen just short of YOUR dream and I sincerely thank you for never having to exercise that responsibility.

I’m unashamedly envious of the emotions that have been generated and experienced by you young men since Saturday and I’m fairly certain they will be more greatly appreciated over time and may look different the farther as the years go by.  I would recommend that you take the time to embrace and absorb each feeling because you are one of only a select few that get to experience it.  In my own personal and very private way, I’m still processing what an important chapter has been written in my life from your achievement because of my intangible relationship with both of you starting from the literal birth of Jason and the figurative one with Cole that began on the minor division Dodgers.  I’m so glad I was alive to see it after some really close calls that almost robbed me of the opportunity and I can only thank you for “playing as if it were my last game” in the remote chance it was the last one I’d remember given this “brain thing.”

So let me draw to a close with this thought.  There was some debate at the beginning of this season whether this potentially was the best baseball team in the 100 year history of Redondo High.  When the final out was recorded on Saturday with the undisputed title of CIF Champions being bestowed on the 2015 team, I think that any arguments disputing who might have been better has been put to rest since no one from this community, alive or not, has accomplished it.  As I’ve said before, “greatness is no accident”, and where you sit today, you can be satisfied that greatness has been achieved!

Last quote. “If you’ve got nothing to dance about, find a reason to sing.” — Melody Carstairs.  Since Saturday and for the remainder of your life and carrying on historically, you will always be able to look at this accomplishment and both dance and sing. I’m humbled by the gratitude I owe you boys and I’ve been doing the same in private so as not to embarrass myself.