• Home
  • Intro To The Writer Joe Dicochea – Click for Short and Long Version

JoeDicoSpeaks

~ Convergence of reflections, contemplations, and other musings

JoeDicoSpeaks

Monthly Archives: August 2017

Sometimes What’s Perfect Is Greater Than Perfection – Thoughts To My Family

28 Monday Aug 2017

Posted by jdicochea in Finding Happiness, Hope, Looking forward, Reflection

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Faith, Family, Future, Guidance, Happiness, Inspiration, Joy, Life, Motivation, Self-Help, Sharing, Thanks, The Journey

IMG_3046

(Reposting of thoughts that carry as much, if not more, meaning today than the day I wrote it.)

11/9/14

“Aim for success, not perfection.  Never give up your right to be wrong, because then you will lose the ability to learn new things and move forward with your life.” – Dr. David M. Burns

Perfection is the ideal but the perfect result may be entirely different.  The fabric of our identity is not defined by what we originally envision for ourselves but the difficulties that we ultimately have to confront to get to where we eventually end up.

We struggle too often with our expectations and what we feel we deserve which sometimes is masked behind feelings of entitlement.  Quoting a line from an old movie, “deserving has got nothing to do with it” or at least our perception of it.  Do you really think that God has children born into starving countries or impoverished communities because they deserve it?  That doesn’t make sense and the simple answers as to why it happens is that “I don’t know”, and “it’s not for me to know”.  Thinking about “why them”, and “why not me”, is as perplexing when things are not going well for us and we form the questions “why me” and “why not them?”  Same simple answers.

Ask any adult with some years behind them if everything has turned out the way they dreamed whether you want to pin it down on a personal, professional, family, social, physical, creative, or emotional level.  The initial goals and aspirations were based on an ideal yet inexperienced vision of perfection.  The better question is to ask them to compare those dreams to what turned out “perfect” and why.  I’m pretty sure it will be different yet harder to define.

Here’s anothet perfect example.  Ask this other question to any adult who’s ever faced the challenge of raising a child well, or been married an extended period of time if this reality ever set in:  I knew this wasn’t going to be easy but I didn’t know it was going to be this hard!

We understand the basic reasons as to “why” but figuring out the intricate causes that separated our results from another’s with similar circumstance is perplexing.  I mean why did Brian Piccolo (“Brian’s Song) die in his 20’s from lung cancer after never smoking, and others live into their 90’s after smoking a pack a day?  Why did my best friend’s car get struck by a drunk driver and he was the one who died?  How does a younger, healthier person suffer a head injury/bleed, seizure, and die or end up incapacitated, and I survive with a better than expected recovery?  It troubles me but its better off left to “I don’t know”, and “it’s not important for me to know” since I guess “deserving has got nothing to do with it.”

All unfortunate things happen for a reason whether we may not always understand why at the time.  Sometimes the weight that drags our hearts down takes us to where we need to be.  By being there, we may not find what we want but we can better identify what we don’t want, what we don’t need, what we don’t want to happen, and where we don’t want to be again.  We have a better understanding of our large and small successes in the past, and how misguided we were to think we were entitled to more.  Most importantly, we learn how to measure success differently so that the fruits of our efforts are hopefully better appreciated when we see them again.

Trust me, something does come from what may seem like “nothing” at the time.  It’s only temporary even though we may feel like we’re wasting away under the fatigue.  I’ve accepted that our lives, when stripped to their basics, can make the solutions less complex than they need to be and only complicated by what we feel we are owed from how much we despaired.

Don’t lose hope because success begins from any amount of optimism.  Feeling alone is only a condition of the situation, not a product of our overall circumstances.  Beyond those near us, there are 7 billion people on this planet that should convince us that we’ll never be alone.  Chances are that we’re closer than we know to where we want and “deserve” to be, so slow down, breathe, and take better steps based on what we’ve learned and where we’ve been!

Advertisement

A Full Life – Message To My sons

21 Monday Aug 2017

Posted by jdicochea in Finding Happiness, Looking forward, Reflection

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Accountability, Family, Future, Guidance, Happiness, Inspiration, Joy, Life, Motivation, Self-Help, Sharing, The Journey

8/20/17

IMG_1546

Leadership – Message To My Sons

18 Friday Aug 2017

Posted by jdicochea in Baseball Equals Life, Finding Happiness, Looking forward, Reflection

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Accountability, Family, Future, Guidance, Inspiration, Life, Motivation, Self-Help, Sharing, The Journey

IMG_2408
IMG_2430

8/17/17

I expect you boys to be leaders, not followers; and that can only be accomplished once you understand that leadership is on no greater display than when you consistently illustrate the quality and conviction of your character, morality, and principles, even when others find it convenient to sacrifice their own! – Joe Dico

Reaching Out To The Unlikely – Chalenge To My Sons (All Teens)

16 Wednesday Aug 2017

Posted by jdicochea in Finding Happiness, Gratitude, Kindness, Looking forward, Reflection

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Accountability, Family, Future, Guidance, Happiness, Inspiration, Joy, kindness, Life, Motivation, Peace, Sharing, Thanks, The Journey

IMG_3009.PNG

(This is one of my first posts and I feel humbled and proud that my boys have honored the wishes set forth below since the day I first shared it with them)

1/24/15

“Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you. ” – Princess Diana

So now I’m going to ask you boys for something which is less a request and more of a challenge and test.  In a way it’s something you owe yourselves as part of a discovery of who you are and how others see you and/or may be affected by you.  At a minimum after all I’ve written and hopefully assisted you with, this is something that you owe me.

Life has a funny way of working out but many things are not really random.  It can be excellent at times and others, well not so much.  Our ability to make an average day better from our own efforts is not something we should take for granted when we boil it down to its basics.  The best part of our day and overall existence should not be the greatest gifts we receive but the simplest gifts we give and just maybe, create for others.

You boys by virtue of being athletes, relatively easy on the eyes, personable, charming, fairly witty, etc., consequently may fall into the “popular” and “admired” categories, at least in the high and middle school arenas.  All of this changes in the college settings where you can get overlooked in a larger population and the grading scale of success is different.

So take this time to use this aspect of your status to reach out to those who would never imagine that you would even acknowledge them.  They are no less important than those you regularly interact with and importantly, can add a new dimension to your emerging interpersonal skills by exploring their own unique and distinctive attributes.  You just might be surprised that by performing this simple act of altruism, you may expand your understanding of your infinite coexistence with a few of the 7 billion people on this planet.

This is a perfect time to attempt to figuratively “touch someone” in an unexpected and meaningful fashion because of the daily paths you cross in your school communities.  When you get older and in your professional world, you will meet a lot of people who you are essentially required to interact with, and consequently it’s financially beneficial to excel in that capacity.  But how authentic are those interactions when the objectives are more self-serving than a genuine extension of the best of who you are.  It’s no excuse, just the frequent trap that engulfs us.  It’s unfortunate to find that we ignore the opportunities, either due to the hectic pace or schedule of our days, to slow down and capitalize on the random lives that we can affect or be affected by.

So my challenge is to make a simple attempt this next week (or longer) to acknowledge the unlikeliest of suspects whether it be another student, teacher, staff member, janitor, acquaintance, etc., who may fall outside your normal social sphere and would least expect it – I’m sure you can think of a few people who fall in that category.  Take an extra few seconds to just say “hi” or “how are you” to that person and pay attention to the response, if any, and do it at least one more time in the upcoming days.  If done only once, it can be construed as a fluke or aberration.  Importantly, initiate the encounter and use the person’s name, look at them, smile, and again at a minimum, wait for some sort of response and then take it however you wish from there.  Don’t think about it too much – just try it because there’s no reason not to and you might find a surprising return on the investment.

I’m not asking you to adopt my routine because frankly, you probably think I’m nuts!  I have the time, desire, and my own personal objectives which essentially involve gratitude for where I’m at and where I want my soul to remain.  Some might think I reach out to so many random individuals outside of my comfort zone for attention but that’s where they’d be mistaken.  My intention has never been to draw attention to myself (although that’s often the outcome), but to give my attention to those around me who deserve or maybe could just use it.  In the end though, I know that I benefit from it in too many ways to count and describe in detail.

All of our lives offer so many unnoticed and undiscovered things which really take little awareness to uncover.  Sometimes we get so locked inside our routines to appreciate what’s in front of us because we think external demands and distractions insist upon it.  Let’s be clear – they shouldn’t, they’re really not as significant as you think, and you can control your approach to them, all for the better!

So please be thoughtful in everything you do, and let that also include those who just happen to be part of your surroundings because the opportunities are abundant and shouldn’t be ignored.

And you want to know why it should come easy?  Because it’s the way you were raised, it’s who you are, and it honors your parents and those who influenced you to be that way!

Image

It’s How You Look At Things – A Choice

14 Monday Aug 2017

Tags

Accountability, Future, Guidance, Happiness, Inspiration, Joy, Life, Motivation, Peace, Self-Help, Thanks, The Journey

IMG_1540

Posted by jdicochea | Filed under Finding Happiness, Gratitude, Hope, Looking forward, Reflection

≈ Leave a comment

Important Things – Thoughts To My Sons

01 Tuesday Aug 2017

Posted by jdicochea in Finding Happiness, Hope, Looking forward, Reflection

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Family, Future, Guidance, Happiness, Inspiration, Life, Motivation, Peace, Self-Help, Sharing, The Journey

img_1053

8/1/17

Always remember:  Everything that you think is important at your young age probably isn’t; at least until you figure out whether what you think is unimportant actually is!

Joe Dico

Subscribe

  • Entries (RSS)
  • Comments (RSS)

Archives

  • July 2020
  • January 2020
  • June 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015

Categories

  • Baseball Equals Life
  • Confessional
  • Finding Happiness
  • Gratitude
  • Hope
  • Kindness
  • Looking forward
  • Reflection
  • Sports Equals Life
  • Uncategorized

Meta

  • Register
  • Log in

Blog at WordPress.com.

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Follow Following
    • JoeDicoSpeaks
    • Join 118 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • JoeDicoSpeaks
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...